Last night sucked.
I went to bed late enough -- had to work hard to keep my eyes peeled open and my brain engaged -- reading my latest book. [I'm a terribly slow and easily distracted reader: the dog kept chewing at my toes through the blanket].
Lights off and me snugged up warm and cozy -- sans the wiggly dog. He was retrieved by Pos early on (thank goodness!).
Then I began to twist ..., scrunch ..., curl ..., stretch, roll over ..., grab second pillow, curl ...
I just couldn't settle down.
It was like my brain was good and ready to shut down but my body was waging the "wiggle wars"!
And then the itching and scratching began.
I have no idea why this particular physical annoyance seems to drive me bat shit, but it does.
I try to ignore it: try to imagine it's all psychosomatic.
But my imagination gets the better of me:
Dammit! The dog has fleas!
Bedbugs! OMG! I have a rabid infestation of bedbugs!
Lice! When was the last time there was an outbreak at school. OMG! I'm the next victim!
I have a terminal skin disease--like leprosy--only more subtle and nocturnal in nature!
If I have to scratch ONE MORE TIME I'm going to go flipping crazy!!
And then I proceed to twist ..., scrunch ..., curl ..., stretch, roll over ..., grab second pillow, curl ...,
all over again.
I think I was even doing all of this in what little sleep I managed to get.
Therefore, I woke this morning, feeling like I had a hangover (without the benefit of the fun beforehand!)
I had to carry my weary carcass into work
and I had to pretend to be alert, bright, attentive, and ready for academic action!
Yeah, right!
There wasn't enough caffeine to get me through a day like today ...
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8 comments:
Though it doesn't sound like you reached this point last night, the jerking, the wiggles, the scratching, the pillow shuffling finally working and you realize you have sleep equilibrium. There's a small moment of joy, replaced by the fear if you breath that the mood will be lost. Then victory and you drift. Or lose and start the struggle again.
I absolutely crave that final drift ... when I'm stuck in struggle land, I just about panic and sometimes get sucked into an anxiety attack.
Boy, can I ever empathize with your problems, especially the itching/scratching thing. I can be sitting in front of the computer, nodding off -that sleepy, yes - and I go lay down but as soon as I do that, you know there is this one spot if I am laying on my right side that will begin to itch. It's alwasy in a place that means I have to almost get completely up to reach it to scratch it too. Then another spot will start and it just seems hell-bent to travel all over my body that wasy! Drives me bonkers.
Well, apparently, we were in the same boat. I too had trouble sleeping - - even after taking my nightly Ambien CR (which I still highly reccomend for insomiacs such as myself). So, I took another one 'cause five hours of some kind of sleep is better than none. I was definitely hungover, too.
Since I've been reading your husband's blog for a while now, and Dave and Jeni have such nice things to say about you, I decided to come by and say howdy. I'll try to stop in more often.
Jeni -
I know -- it's enough to make a sane person crazy. I hate the bedtime itchies!
BTW - had a much better night last night. Now all I need is three more solid sleeps and I'm good!
Lil sis -
Can't do drugs ... my weekly red wine imbibe is all I can manage. Luckily these are very infrequent bouts of insomnia and I can usually recover in a couple of days.
Dr. Sardonicus -
So lovely you popped by! It's always such a treat to have new visitors stop by and check out my ramblings.
Hey, I've just come over to see your blog, having 'met' you at Mya's in the Pyrenees, and ooh, I'm on your blog roll already. Thank you.
Sleep deprivation - it's a killer.
iota -
So happy you were able to pop by! Sorry to hear of your sleep deprived state -- tis one of the major reasons I stopped having children and dismissed the idea of pursuing a masters degree.
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